i just finished watching the video of Mrs. Winnie Monsod, an Econ professor here in University of the Philippines Diliman, and i must say, with no doubt, she just slapped my face with her fierce words.

what am i doing this 5 semesters? In my first year, my course was BA Communication Arts, then I transferred to Diliman campus, and because of this sickness that I have since grade two in elementary, I was damn to lazy to apply to the course that I really want, then ended where I am now. Being an undergraduate in B Library and Information Science. But still determined not to graduate from UP under the BLLIS college. Next school semester, I’m gonna take Lingguistic. I already gave up my dream from being a graduate of Business Administration because of my idiot brain who knows nothing about numbers. Yes I am so idiot. It pains me when I sit come to my Trigonometry class and then the professor will say something to those student who always fail and is very laid back. Damn, if only i could raise my hand and reply that it hurts so much and can you please stop it now? But no, I don’t have courage to do that.

Mrs. Monsod speech to her last class in Econ 100.1 made realized how fool am I in the University.

Hearing those words, how i wish I could turn back the time and start it all over again, but NO. I should not thinking of those wishful thoughts. I only have 5 semesters to fulfill my college life.

what am i doing this time? nothing, just sitting and watching the great show–the show where I can see the greatness of my school. The honor and excellence I always see during exams.

Oh god. I must be damn idiot.

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it’s been almost 1oo days since i stop conducting lessons in Rarejob. Well, things happen–shit happens.

i’m thinking of another part-time job. i was very happy when i got accepted at Rarejob last year. i was so excited and felt a bit independent cause now, i’ll be able to buy things for myself using my money. i manage my time and have my decision. yeah i felt really happy 🙂 🙂

then i met my students and even friends. yeah friends 😀 i won’t write your names here, they already know who they are. but now, i don’t know if they can still remember me. i’m just an ordinary tutor nothing “extraordinary” haha. i even commit mistakes and sometimes, i talk nonsensical things. there were times, i felt that i’m so immature talking to grown-ups on Skype. but indeed every lesson was a great experience. i miss some of my students whom i really like but they don’t like me haha. ironical.

i learned a lot. and i want to say thank you. thank you very much. *teary-eyed*

i think i’ll to stop being a “rarejobber.” yeah, i’ll try my luck to other part-time jobs out there.

–tutor ber.

P.S. to my students whose reading this now. well, out of nothing i made this story. it’s just a JOKE! haha 😀 see you 🙂 🙂 hope we’ll be able to talk some time in the near future.

seven days from now the Philippines will change–i hope so.

in accordance to what will happen seven days from now, i made my wish list and i will address this list to anyone whose in concern.

1. there will be no more traffic especially in Katipunan 🙂

2. jeepneys should also be available with air conditioner not only in Makati but also in the other parts of the Philippines.

3. student’s fare policy should not be limited to Monday-Friday only (weekdays) but also even weekends (hello, we’re still students during that time hehe :p )

4. student’s allowance should adapt to current Philippine economic status (in short, i demand an additional amount for my allowance 😀 ).

5. a ______, _________, and ________ again *grin smile*

6. professors should be much kinder to our generation (it’s really hard to graduate on time 😦 you know)

7. the list goes on (..along side with my other “wants” in life..)

look at my list it’s too selfish again haha. so let’s change it a bit.

1. i’ll just wake up early to avoid the traffic build up 🙂

2. i’ll just use fan/readings/etc. to make myself cool and in good temper 🙂

3. i’ll try to decrease the number of my “lakwatsa” day especially on weekends (so i’ll try to do some gala pa rin but during weekdays so that i can still have that student’s fare)–konyo??

4. i’ll try to save and avoid temptations (it’s soo hard 😦 )

5. i’ll work again and improve my time management (seriously i’ll work again)

6. i’ll really try my best to study sooo hard (hard as stone haha)

7. (haha it’s secret)

there you go,  Philippines will have her new president officially next week (June 30, 2010) or shall i say new leaders. so i will try to make some changes. in the end, the wish list goes under my responsibility, and if i succeed, (and i hope other Filipinos will also do some changes) perhaps my country will do better then. 🙂

the secret to perfection is in the details–credits to my Prof. Juanico “KAIZEN” 🙂

WARNING: the contents in this post might be too selfish. :p

that night was unbearable. I could not convince myself to sleep. I’m just lying there, looking at the ceiling and hugging the pillow beside me. after some time, I decided to listen to some music while trying to get some sleep. I noticed a star through the window. the star was so small and the light that comes from it was so weak that I cannot barely see it. I imagine myself at the room and HIM is the star. XD

I am inside s somewhat large dome or theater. lots of people in their glamorous dress passes me by. It feels like I’m one of them, I feel like I am one of the famous and important person–it feels great 😀 😀 then after a moment, I began to see familiar faces and voices.  waa~~I’m not alone, I know them, and yes i know them very well.

I began to realize that there is a concert/press con/tour of the band XXXX (sorry for my selfishness I cannot mention his name hehe). I suddenly feel panic! my adrenalin pumped like it never pumped before. whoa. I saw HIM! (i cannot mention his name again). I hurriedly run to him and he smiled at me and reach his hand to mine. and yes! I feel the softness of his hand (I’m in cloud nine!!). I try to ask for some picture-taking saying that it would only take the 2 seconds of his life, and he say NO! (damn) but I still insist and I just blurt that it would only take 1.3 seconds of his life (yes I admit it. I feel so desperate >_<). and then I feel heaven’s scent (not the cologne one haha) he smiled and then he say YES. he guide me to an empty seat and we did the picture-taking there. and as a typical fans do, I smell my hand and the scent of his hand lingers!

touching others' hand creates electricity and reaction from the person's hormones

touching others' hand creates electricity and reaction from the person's hormones

ehem! that was too good to be true. haha. it will never happen. HIM smiling at me across the theater. damn. when I woke up. my heart is still throbbing. It was fast and my hand that he shook from my unbelievable dream–it was so numb from reality because I can still feel his hand touching mine.

May 29, 2010

when I woke up, I sent him a message saying .. thanks for making my day unbelievably awesome. :p

today i’ll write something serious.

it will be my first time to vote for the national election. i feel kind of scared and at the same time excited. lots of news-might-lead-to-failure-of-election  aired by media every night and every day. seems like it would be 49 rate of being successful and 51 would be failure (in the perspective of the negative Filipinos, at least). but the power of positivism never fails. three days more and i need to be more mature and responsible enough for the next 6 years of the Philippines.

i will sure vote.  god bless my homeland.